Ebay, the home of vintage dresses, second-hand steals, cheap vinyls, and more recently, a ventriloquist doll edition of everyone’s favourite Call Me By Your Name heartthrob Timothée Chalamet. Yes, that’s right, stop what you’re doing right now. Someone has made a Chalamet doll and he’s fucking terrifying.
Somewhere in between uncanny valley and Justin Trudeau, the unnerving doll can be yours for an eye-watering starting price of $122,795 (no-one’s yet made a bid). If that still doesn’t tickle your fancy, the doll replica – that comes equipped with Chalabae’s trademark cheekbones, a steely-eyed stare and presumeably the ability to see into your soul – wears a recreation of the Virgil Abloh-designed Louis Vuitton outfit worn by the 23 year-old actor at this year’s Golden Globes – complete with a beaded and sequined bib (read: harness).
According to the seller page, the doll “makes a perfect gift for any occasion, from (a) baby shower to (a) bar mitzvah”. Whether this is the doll of your dreams, or nightmares, we stan.