Just don’t use toothpaste as lube, please
Sound the alarm, there’s new statistics about how horny everyone is in lockdown. Yesterday (April 21), we found out the horniest cities (looking at you, London), while back in March we discovered that condom brands and sex toy companies were reporting spikes in sales during quarantine. Now, it turns out everyone is Googling homemade sex toys.
According to online marketplace OnBuy, there were over 23,000 Google searches in the UK over the last month, as people researched how to make their own vibrators and lube during self-isolation. Possible household items that can supposedly be used for sexual pleasure include an electric toothbrush, a washing machine, and a hairbrush. Other reports confirm the ultimate stereotype: a cucumber.
Speaking to the Mirror, gynaecologist Dr Shree Datta warned against homemade sex toys, saying: “I would not recommend using make-shift sex toys due to the risk of infection and complications such as retained parts in the vagina. In some cases, women have had to attend A&E.” Datta has also previously spoken out about using toothpaste as a lubricant, explaining that it can contain “bleaching agents, peppermint, or scented oils”, all of which can be “irritating or abrasive”.
the coronavirus has got everyone an emotional and horny wreck— owen (@tameeimpala) March 28, 2020
However, Dr Lauren Streicher, a clinical professor of obstetrics and gynecology, told The New York Post that homemade sex toys can be safe if used responsibly. “Since the beginning of time, people have used things around the house to self-stimulate,” she explained. “If you are looking for a dildo and not a vibrator, and you want to put something in your vagina, make sure there are no sharp edges on the object.”
“Consider putting a condom on it,” Streicher added. “Not because it needs to be sterile, because we know penises are hardly clean. It’s so if something breaks, you don’t have to go fishing for it. If something is on the short side, it may get lost, and if a piece of fruit breaks off, it might be acidic.”
Orders of sex dolls have also spiked since the world went into quarantine, with manufacturer Sex Doll Genie reporting a 52 per cent increase in sales from men, a 16 per cent increase from women, and a 33 per cent increase from heterosexual couples.
Whether you’re doing a Timothée Chalamet in Call Me By Your Name (see: the peach scene), shagging a sex doll, or going down a more traditional route, there’s plenty of material to keep you occupied – Pornhub is offering its premium features for free to the whole world, while sex workers have launched an OnlyFans to support the NHS.