Why does this guy keep attaching dildos to everything?

We speak to the marketing mastermind behind the dildo selfie stick, dildo drone, and now... the dildo hoverboard

Dildo Everything, the powerhouse behind the dildo selfie stick and dildo drone have just revealed a new ad for another product we can’t believe we’ve lived without. The dildo hoverboard.

Hoverboards or ‘swegways’ were the official pest of the pavement before being made illegal; then, they began a weird venture into futuristic porn. And if the fact that they can spontaneously combust doesn’t get you hot enough, perhaps this new attachment will.

The happy customer in the spoof ad is a millenial so busy she's taken to "multi-tasking" with pretty much everything in her life. Everything. Because reading a book on the train just isn't a fun enough way to start the day, she's invested in a much more stimulating gadget to get her from A to B.

Speaking in the video, she adds: "It's not just about multi-tasking its about making your commute to work a lot more fun." Yes, for everyone bored of the hoverboard trend – and orgasm-less commutes – New York-based marketing genius and quasi-social commentator Michael Krivicka has done what he does best to ridicule our latest obsession. 

So we caught up with the man adding dildos to pieces of overhyped tech one trend at a time to finally ask – why?

First we had the dildo selfie stick, now this. Why do you keep making fake dildo tech ads?

Michael Krivicka: It's a niche I found by accident. I first made the Dildo Selfie Stick because I saw a "Selfie Spoon" ad campaign done for a cereal brand. I thought that was pretty stupid. However, once I saw the media attention it was getting I thought to myself -  what else can one attach to the other end of a selfie stick? A dildo? Yes. That would be funny... and sort of practical for a certain audience. So I made the Dildo Selfie Stick video, which went viral.

How do you choose which gadget to feature next?

Michael Krivicka: Each tech/gadget is something that is of big interest right now: Selfie Sticks, Drones, Hoverboards. And it does allude to a deep message about society. The hoverboard itself is something ridiculous that we really don't need and it says a lot about how lazy we have become. So, attaching a dildo to it just emphasizes that. On top of that, making a realistic looking video promo for it as a product, takes it home.

Is it as simple as thinking of different gadget trends to attach dildo’s to or is there more though that goes into production?

Michael Krivicka: Well, I saw the obsession with drones and I started seeing trending videos with different objects being attached to drones (a machine gun, a chainsaw, etc). And I thought: what else could you attach to a drone that would make it funny? A dildo! So I made the Dildo Drone, which became a global news story and got over 40 million total Facebook video views. That triggered the requests to start pouring in for more of these Dildo/Gadget videos. So I made the Dildo Hoverboard.

There is a consistent theme in the videos. Each episode features a new woman who has a different character and personality from the previous one. Each woman also has her own needs which are satisfied by the featured dildo gadget. Each episode is roughly 30 seconds long, which is still the standard TV spot format. I wanted to make sure this series had a certain level of consistency.

Including different characters with different needs make these ‘ads’ relatable. The first one is serious, drinks wine, and has long straight hair. The second one is more bubbly and excited, drinks beer and eats burgers. The third one is a modern ‘millennial’ with no time for anything. These are all traits others can relate to.

“The hoverboard itself is something ridiculous that we really don't need and it says a lot about how lazy we have become. So, attaching a dildo to it just emphasizes that.” – Michael Krivicka

So in a way you’re a social commentator highlighting society’s shortcomings by attaching dildos to our latest obsessions.

Michael Krivicka: Absolutely agreed. There is a reason I have shot and edited the videos in that ad like format. To some it might be an obvious parody, to others it will look like a legit TV spot. The goal is to question the idea of the video and ask ‘what if this was real?’. I can not tell you how many requests I have gotten for the dildo drone and the dildo selfie stick. Real requests from individuals and manufacturing shops who want to mass produce it. It's crazy.

Would you ever make the products if you got enough demand?

Michael Krivicka: I will most definitely not make any of these into products. This is simply too dangerous, too silly, too impractical, and the hoverboard especially is something that takes a private and intimate time into the public, which is simply wrong. However, that's what makes it funny.

What have been the reactions so far – do you think people get the deeper message?

Michael Krivicka: Sites like Metro UK and the Huffington Post have picked it up and they are obviously not taking it seriously. I think they understand the underlying statement and humor. Other sites will pick it up, people will tweet it and share and every new viewer will make his/her own opinion on it. Even if one know for sure that this is a joke, one can still wonder what if this was real. The conversation is always open.

I am building a fanbase with this series and people are anxiously awaiting the next episode. The only other question is what else could you attach a dildo to and present it as a practical and fully functioning product?

Dildo Uber for when you want the pleasure to come to you?

Michael Krivicka: That is a great idea! Love it.

You heard it here first.