In an interview with MTV News, Charli XCX has revealed that her plans to develop "Pussy Power" tampons and sell them to female fans on tour have ground to a halt due to health and safety regulations. "I really wanted to make tampon merch,” she said. “That was a dream of mine for a really long time — to have tampons that say ’Sucker’ on the side and ’Pussy Power’ on the box. But it’s a health issue if someone’s going to put it in their vagina.”

Bad news for Charli – but she isn't the only star who's tried to get involved with weird merch. Let's see who succeeded where she failed.

THE KISS KONDOM

You meet someone in a club and go back to their house. You're thinking how much you like them as things get physical. After five minutes of passionate kissing, that crucial question comes up. "Do you have any protection?" you whisper. "Sure," they say and reach into their bedside drawer.

You start putting on the condom, but it quickly becomes apparent that something isn't quite right. The internal monologue no-one wants to have during sex is, "Fuckinghell, is that Gene Simmons?" Unfortunately, that's exactly the type of horrific paranoia the Kiss Kondom instigates.

PIXIES CYCLING TOP

This is one of the most confusing garments of recent times. Why has someone made this? You know what has absolutely nothing to do with cycling? The Pixies. If you're the kind of fitness freak who wants to remind everyone that you know a thing or two about seminal guitar bands then this £75 piece of lycra is for you.

RAMMSTEIN DILDOS

German shock-rockers Rammstein are known for spraying fake jizz and blood all over audiences, so selling dildos moulded on band members' penises isn't that much of a surprise. This metal flight case of depravity comes with handcuffs, lubricant and six "true to life" dildos of varying sizes, enabling the owner to get a real feel for what it's like to get intimate with Rammstein.