After appearing to single-handedly shut down Berghain while wearing a Corona T-shirt, everyone’s favourite love-to-hate scammer Caroline Calloway is back with her long-awaited response to former friend Natalie Beach.

The Instagram influencer was at the centre of a social media storm last year, after Beach’s lengthy tell-all piece on The Cut about their relationship went viral. It was announced yesterday (March 31) that Calloway would be releasing her highly-anticipated “Natalie Response” in three 15,000 word chapters on her website I am Caroline Calloway every week. The rebuttal will include extracts from Calloway’s upcoming book Scammer, which has reportedly been delayed due to the coronavirus pandemic.

Those wanting to access the response will have to pay $10 for all three pieces to raise money for Direct Relief, a humanitarian organisation currently securing protective equipment for medical workers and first responders treating coronavirus patients.

Although Calloway says she’s aware “corona rly puts into perspective how dumb the sapphic plight of two white girls is,” she wrote on Instagram: “Methinks we need some high quality tea to get us through these trying times.” 

Anyone who donates $100 or more, will get a signed “Dreamer bb”, one of her controversial homemade collages. “What's a Dreamer Bb? Matisse walked so I could fly,” reads a description on her website. It adds: “The story is free for anyone who's lost their job because of coronavirus, or pre-ordered Scammer.”

Bear in mind, Beach’s essay was professionally fact-checked (though Calloway has rebuffed the tone of some instances, and some of the claims made), and Calloway’s – insofar as we can tell – has not been.

*Stirs tea*