Doodling on the web with Nigel Farage, Becky&Jo are back, Mariah Carey sing-a-longs, and, ever wondered what Jay-Z has in a sandwich?
“Tim Curry wasn’t just the sneering concierge in Home Alone 2. He’s had a variety of multi-dimensional roles that defy Brit stereot – kidding, he plays Wadsworth the butler in Clue. If you’ve finished watching The Jinx, Clue will fill that void for crime drama with more twists and turns than the 9,600 mile endurance rollercoaster. In his piece, Adam B. Vary tracks down literally everyone who had anything to do with this box office bomb to home video smash to piece together the full story behind this underrated gold mine of one liners.” – Trey Taylor, Film Editor (@TreyTylor)
“This weekend, I went along to a very inspiring, very clappy conference inspired by Naomi Klein's climate-change bomb of a book, This Changes Everything. At one point during the QandAs at the end of a panel, an audience member suggested that the green movement avoid talking about ‘polar bears or whatever‘. My partner mouthed at me ‘what's so bad about polar bears?‘ This excellent piece from celebrated author and animal-rights advocate Jonathan Franzen breaks this debate down in brilliant detail: that the carbon crisis cannot eclipse our wider duty to not kill lots and lots and lots of animals. Including polar bears.“ – Charlie Robin Jones, Digital Editor (@CharliexJones)
BUSCH GARDENS UNVEILS NEW 9,600-MILE-LONG ENDURANCE COASTER
“No matter how many times I've read it since last summer, The Onion's Staminator article never fails to make me laugh my head off. I love everything about it. The concept of 14-day roller-coaster ride that 'reportedly plunges riders into winding, pitch-black underground tunnels for two straight days, returning to the surface for a 10-hour ascent to the peak of Mount Elbert in Colorado before forcing passengers to endure a precipitous 1,400-story drop' is pure comical genius, as is their illustration of the route and the interviews with the Staminator's lucky riders. 'I have to admit that I closed my eyes for the first few states and I didn’t really like getting wet when we dipped underwater for the entire length of Lake Tahoe, but overall, I thought it was incredible,' said passenger Andrew Hoppe. 'Honestly, the whole thing went by really fast, so I’d love to go again. It sucks that you have to wait in line for 90 minutes to get back on, though.'” – Tim Noakes, Editor-in-Chief (@TimNoakes)
“The first thing I did with this? Draw a giant Farage cock, with tiny gurning Farage heads for balls and spurting Farage heads dotted across my phone screen. And then I wiped the screen clean, and did it again. And again. It’s pretty satisfying actually, I reached an almost meditative state of LOLs. Today marks the first day of #dazednation, our General Election coverage. Read our 8-point Dazed manifesto here – spanning education, nightlife, gender equality and lots more important stuff you care about.” – Natasha Slee, Social Media Assistant (@TashaLouiseS)
A BRIEF HISTORY OF RAPPERS AND SANDWICHES
“It’s not all about 2 Chainz Instagramming food on his Versace plates. This comprehensive guide shows how Jay-Z, A$AP Ferg, and other rap-game power players pay tribute to the humble sandwich. TBH it’s worth reading just to see Drake getting upset about his Mum getting him the wrong sandwich.” – Sean Carpenter, Digital Marketing Coordinator (@SeanCarpenter2)
CORDON AND CAREY'S CARPOOL KARAOKE
“For his second week in, Cordon has really been bringing in the big guns in his takeover from Craig Ferguson on The Late Late Show. Going into a bank holiday weekend nothing (seriously, nothing!) makes me happier than a bit of Mariah. But then, throw in Mariah singing along to Mariah and, well, I'm a happy bunny.“ – Ashleigh Kane, Digital Assistant (@AshleighKane)
APRIL FOOLS' DAY 2015 – THE BEST JOKES FROM AROUND THE WORLD
“I don’t normally care about April Fools day (what’s the point) or live-blogging (seriously what’s the point), but I thought this was great. Mainly because you got to watch Stuart Heritage actually have a full-on nervous breakdown in real time. It’s particularly rewarding when you start right from the bottom and read to the top – that way you can relive it moment for moment and LOL ROFL at his terrible despair.” – Dominique Sisley, Editorial Assistant (@DominiqueSisley)
“Hey, we've all had some days when all we want to do is switch off from the outside world, mainline Netflix and order takeaway without speaking to another person unless absolutely necessary. It's a basic human instinct, right? Which makes Lauren Smiley's feature on the on-demand economy so much scarier. She talks about a new world populated by tech-savvy San Franciscans who use apps to outsource everything from delivering groceries to folding their underwear drawer – and the implications that has on human connections and loneliness.“ – Zing Tsjeng, News Editor (@misszing)
PATTON OSWALT'S EPIC TWITTER RANT ABOUT TREVOR NOAH, AND THE FAIR WEATHER ALLY
“When Trevor Noah was announced as the man who’d be replacing Jon Stewart on The Daily Show, everybody unanimously agreed it was A Good Thing, until they dug out some offensive tweets about Jewish people and women from a few years ago. Offensive or not (they were really), the jokes weren’t funny, but I can’t help but feel that we live in a culture of outrage where being seen to be angry about everything is just as valuable currency as being angry. Something about Patton Oswalt’s 53 tweet play on how we’re careful not to offend resonated with me. In an age when everything we say is essentially archived, our behaviour is changing. This is an interesting longread on why Patton Oswalt is both kind of right and also completely wrong.” – Thomas Gorton, Digital News Writer (@AngstromHoot)
(52/53) Welcome to comedy in 2015, @Trevornoah!
— Patton Oswalt (@pattonoswalt) April 1, 2015
"Dazed Visionaries Becky&Joe managed to smash it once again with their fourth instalment of “Don’t Hug Me I’m Scared” ...why does their calendar always mark June 19?" – Camilla Mathis, Production Coordinator (@CamillaMathis)