In a new interview with Vanity Fair, Adele has opened up about her melancholic temperament and her tendency toward depression.
“The music I’ve always been drawn to is sad,” she says. “I’ve always been pretty melancholy. Obviously not as much in my real life as the songs are, but I have a very dark side. I’m very available to depression. I can slip in and out of it quite easily. It started when my granddad died, when I was about 10, and while I never had a suicidal thought, I have been in therapy, lots.”
“But,” she continues, “I haven’t had that feeling since I had my son and snapped out of my postpartum depression.”
Adele goes on to discuss her experience of postpartum or postnatal depression – an illness which, according to the Royal College of Psychiatrists, affects between 10 to 15 in every 100 women having a baby.
“My knowledge of postpartum – or post-natal, as we call it in England – is that you don’t want to be with your child; you’re worried you might hurt your child; you’re worried you weren’t doing a good job. But I was obsessed with my child. I felt very inadequate; I felt like I’d made the worst decision of my life... It can come in many different forms.
“Eventually I just said, I’m going to give myself an afternoon a week, just to do whatever the fuck I want without my baby. A friend of mine said, ‘Really? Don’t you feel bad?’ I said, I do, but not as bad as I’d feel if I didn’t do it. Four of my friends felt the same way I did, and everyone was too embarrassed to talk about it; they thought everyone would think they were a bad mom, and it’s not the case. It makes you a better mom if you give yourself a better time.”
Adele joins a number of musicians who have opened up about their experiences of mental health in the past year – from Years and Years’ Olly Alexander to Zayn Malik, Kehlani and most recently, Kid Cudi.
Read the full interview here.