Leah Williamson: ‘I will never, ever regret spending so long at Arsenal’

At the age of nine, Leah Williamson played her first game for Arsenal – and promptly broke her arm during the match. At the hospital, when the doctor tried to cut her kit away from her arm, Williamson refused. “There was no way I was going to let her cut that shirt! I had obviously just got my kit; it was brand new. You only got one for the season and there was no way,” she says. 20 years later, still a Gunner, that pride and protectiveness for her club has never wavered. “The fact that something can have an Arsenal badge and my name at the same time is something that still makes me feel, ‘wow.’”

Today, Arsenal fans can breathe a sigh of relief because that 20-year journey is continuing – Williamson has renewed her contract once again. Speaking to Dazed in a booth tucked away in a corner of Emirates Stadium a week before the announcement, she is confident, quietly pleased, sure in the decision to remain with her childhood club. While most players have to leave home when they are young and move far away in search of their dreams, hers were there waiting on her doorstep; the local team just happened to also be one of the best in the world.

As someone very close to her family, who loves the safety and comfort of a familiar routine to ground her in the chaos of the job, she knows how lucky she has been. “That’s why I wouldn’t waste it, and that’s why I give everything. My career has been plagued with injuries because I’m not willing to give anything less than everything I have. There’s no handbrake here. It’s all or nothing. And I enjoy that rush,” she says.

Following a victorious season that saw her win the Champions League with Arsenal and a second Euros as captain of England, Williamson’s last year has been plagued with injuries, which meant playing fewer matches than she – and the fans – would have hoped. But having recovered from a hamstring problem, she was back on the pitch for a first-leg semi-final Champions League win against OL Lyonnes, and last night scored a goal in a 7-0 victory against Leicester in the WSL. The end of the season is ramping up to be a nail-biting one for Arsenal and Williamson.

Below, she discusses the new contract, navigating being in the limelight, and why the producers of Bend it Like Beckham 2 should give her a call.

Congratulations on the new contract!

Leah Williamson: Thank you. I’ve been here for 20 years this season. It’s been a long time. I’ve given quite a lot of myself, but I think the club’s given a lot back to me. I don’t think it’s over yet – we’ve still got some time left together. I want to be better. The club wants to be better. So I just feel like this is the right place for me to be. I think if you’ve been somewhere for so long, to leave, you’d need to have a reason. There’s work to be done, but I feel happy. I feel good when I come to work. And for me, that’s one of the most important things.

If you retired at Arsenal, would you look back and feel fulfilled and with no regrets? 

Leah Williamson: I think so. If that were to happen tomorrow, I think I’ve lived and competed and contributed as best I could. And I will never, ever regret spending so long here. Winning the Champions League was fucking amazing, because I’ve worked so hard and finally [achieved] something really, really tangible, part of history. But even without that, I would never, ever regret the time I’ve spent. 

That win must have been even sweeter because you’ve put the work in and built it from the start. You didn’t just join an amazing team – not that there’d be anything wrong with that – you helped build it.  

Leah Williamson: What a beautiful thing. And if I had ever turned my back on that, previously, when everything was climbing, I think it would have really upset me. And if I had [won the Champions League] for the first time somewhere else, I know I wouldn’t have had the same moment.

And football’s a business. There’ll be a day when they don’t want me, when my time here is done because I can’t offer them what they deserve, and they won’t be able to do the same for me. But that time is not now. This is probably one of the hardest contracts I’ve signed, because you have to make sure that you are still competitive and you can still give everything. But I feel that there are levels I haven’t reached yet. My biggest thing in football is no what-ifs, and I’ll be damned if I leave any stone unturned.

How are you feeling with the injury?

Leah Williamson: Good, now. It’s been a really, really hard season, especially when you’ve had so much success – won the Champions League, won the Euros, you were excited to go again, and I missed out on a lot. But I made decisions in the summer to be competitive and to put myself in a position that wasn’t going to be healthy afterwards. I decided to do it, and I’d do it again. I’d do anything for both teams I play for. It’s been frustrating, but it’s not been a shocker – this is what happens when you take your body to that place.

How do you deal with the disappointments and the pressures that come with injuries? It’s such a frequent part of this game. 

Leah Williamson: In football, you have to get so comfortable with the unknown. And they are [frequent], that’s why you can’t really ever be mad at it. Because you signed up to do this job. I used to get really angry, and now I don’t. I think there’s a reason that things happen, whether you can see it at the time or not.

I also think go back ten years, if I got injured, I wouldn’t have been paid, and now I am. I’m paid to get better. So it’s just as much part of my job as it is to play, which I think helps with the motivation and the reality check. The worst thing that can happen in football is that you start to pity yourself. There’s no time for that. It’s my job to get better. 

We have been seeing a lot of injuries in the women’s game. This is something you’re asked about a lot, but what kind of things do you want to see change?

Leah Williamson: I think it’s a beautiful thing that the game is being invested in, that there’s more commercial value, that there’s more money. But I think the acceleration pace and the rapid addition of games with the generation that's still playing – it’s the generation that wasn’t supported like that when they were younger. We weren't bred for this. Of course, we all want to play in as many games as possible. And I think the backlash on this conversation is ‘they just want a holiday’. I mean, I’d love a holiday. Everybody would love a holiday. That’s not what we’re saying. You want to be healthy. You don’t want to watch from the sidelines. 

So many of the best players in the world are sitting out for long periods of time. It’s the same in men’s football. The rising injuries are due to the schedule and the lack of rest. Football has basically become a 12-month calendar. It’s really, really hard, and I don’t think it’s sustainable for any individual.

You’ve said that among the team, you encourage each other to take part in research projects and studies [around female athletes].

Leah Williamson: Yeah, because we are constantly fed the answer that there is no research on women’s teams. It’s just like that in society. But the way it has been doesn’t mean it has to be the way it’s going forward. It’s frustrating that I signed up to offer my body for research, and I’m not going to see the benefits of it. But somebody in 15 years will, and maybe my daughter will, looking to the future. You have a lot of conscientious players in the women’s game.

Do you feel like your job is partly in the present, but then also always thinking of the future and making sure the doors are open for future generations? Is that hard? Do you ever wish you could just play for yourself? 

Leah Williamson: Sometimes. I think, as a collective, we look at the men’s game as a clear demonstration of something that’s 50 years ahead, and it looks really luxurious to be able to just focus on their performance and just turn up to be the best for the fans. I don’t think we’ve ever had that luxury. And some of the men’s players obviously do amazing work off the pitch too. But I think the responsibility for us is: we’ve seen how far we’ve come, and we don’t ever want to go back. I don’t want to have won two European Championships for it not to be accessible to somebody else in the future. What would be the point?

Arsenal Women is really leading the way when it comes to selling tickets and filling up stadiums. The team has also been very embraced by the arts and the fashion community. You’ve said that it’s like a fashion show sometimes at the matches. Why do you think that the club resonated so much with creatives? 

Leah Williamson: There’s space here to be whatever you want to be. I said once, if I ever found out that our environment had become exclusive in any way or felt like a space that somebody couldn't come into, I wouldn’t understand how we’d got there, because it’s not what we were born out of. It’s not the pillars or the values on which the game has grown. So I think that appeals to people.

There’s a level of activism about being a women’s football fan. Not for everybody, but I think if you want to tap into that, then it’s there for you to do. And I feel like all of these expressive, creative people have found a really nice space to demonstrate that, or feel like they’re a part of something bigger. Men have always had that with their sports teams – but how often do women find something like this? This is one of the few [opportunities] that I know of, really, for a woman to turn up and be largely surrounded by women in a capacity of that size.

You said that after the first Euros win, your life changed overnight in terms of public recognition. How has that been? And how have you navigated it? 

Leah Williamson: I don’t love it. I struggle with attention. I’ve never been the best at being in the limelight, in terms of how it makes me feel. But I like knowing I’m making a difference. I like knowing that we’re all making a difference, and I try to give as much of myself as I think is healthy to that cause, if that makes sense. I’d love to just be able to go down the pub with my mates again for the quiz, and just sit and talk and not have to worry. I worry for the people around me, I think more so than anything else. I just don’t want them to stop hanging out with me because we get bothered.

Do people come up to you, or is it more about taking pictures and then talking online?

Leah Williamson: Do you know what the most beautiful thing is? I don’t see anything online. I’m just not part of it. So unless somebody told me something, I wouldn’t know. But the most beautiful thing is when somebody comes up – I’ve done it to people that I respect – and says, ‘I think you’re amazing’, or ‘I think you’re brilliant’. Nobody’s ever going to be mad that you did that. We should do that more to anybody on the street. ‘I love your hair’, ‘I love your dress’, whatever. 

It’s a balance. My job is to go and win. But at the same time, my existence and my visibility, the position that I’m in as a female, is so powerful. I understand that, and I want that to ripple as far and wide as possible. So I think I’ll always be committed to that, while also just trying to keep some level of normality.

Do you feel pressure to look a certain way or act a certain way because of this new attention on you?

Leah Williamson: No, and that’s purely down to the influence of my mum. She’s always done what she wants, and I’ve followed suit. I think the only thing that scared me a little bit, for a time, was that I became a lot less expressive. I would just be quite passive, and I didn’t want to show my emotion because I just couldn’t be bothered with the conversation around it.

Everyone’s opinion?

Leah Williamson: Yeah. Everybody was watching and I thought it was safer to just be neutral, which is not how I want to live my life. I want to feel and show my emotions. I think that’s a lovely thing, and I appreciate it in other people. But I think I have found my balance with it now.

What helped you push through that to be more expressive again?

Leah Williamson: I had bad times. I had to go down, I think, to then realise that I don’t want to be like that, so I needed to find a way to deal with it.

My last question – has anyone reached out to you about Bend It Like Beckham 2?

Leah Williamson: [Laughs] No, but they can give me a call whenever. Me and my agent. I would be absolutely delighted to help in any way I can. I’ll drive a cab. I’m not concerned. In a flat cap. 

Make a little cameo!

Leah Williamson: Yeah, a little cameo. I’ll hold the door open. I don’t mind. I’ll take water on set. I’m actually not fussed. Anything! Do you know what actually pisses me off is that that movie was so big, it transcended football – it wasn’t just women’s footballers that watched it. Everybody’s seen Bend it Like Beckham, it was massive. And then nothing happened off the back of it. [Everything was] still really slow. Do you know what I’m saying? Alas. [But] we are where we are. We got here.