At the end of last summer, MC, a 28-year-old in Brooklyn, says she found herself on a very austere monastery website, emailing some Carthusian nuns in Upstate New York. She had done her research – finding a monastery that wasn’t too far from the city – and was sent some dates to sign up for a four-day silent retreat in October, the weekend before Halloween. “I had always wanted to take a vow of silence and go to a monastery,” MC says. “It was the best thing I’ve ever done in my life; I found a deep sense of calm in being alone in the woods with nuns for the week.” However, when she went back to the monastery’s website to sign up for the same experience this summer, she received a reply saying they were fully booked for summer, but would let MC know if someone cancelled. Akin to securing a reservation at a rave restaurant or vacation hotspot, are young people flocking to monasteries for the summer? 

After trying and failing to book her vow of silence, MC posted a video on TikTok. “Do you want to know how bad things are?” she said, sharing that the monasteries are “full for the summer, girls”. Soon after, the comments became flooded with other women interested in taking a vow of silence. “I think the response to the video shows something that I have felt, which was feeling a little overstimulated and wanting time to reconnect in nature, while having the structure of a monastic retreat where you do follow certain rituals,” she says. MC was surprised at how many young people were also yearning for a break from modern life – one entirely more disconnected and dedicated than a traditional vacation. It could be The White Lotus effect, as a Buddhist monastery featured heavily in the latest season, or even the SZA effect, with the singer recently taking a 10-day vow of silence in India.

As a growing number of young people embark on spiritual journeys, including those attending church and turning to prayer, the idea of ‘disappearing into the woods’ is becoming more compelling. “Given the political climate, technology and expenses, it’s a very romanticised ideal that I think people are drawn to,” says MC. Where once crunchy yoga and meditation retreats may have appeased the crowds, some people are turning their attention to traditional religions like catholicism. Across social media, people are using the term #MonkMode with wellness connotations similar to a 75-day challenge, promoting disappearing as a new way to “level up” and come back as a “completely unrecognisable version of yourself”. Somewhat ironically, instead of focusing on the faith, there’s a certain level of wellness culture embedded in the discussion. There are “monk schedules” for building your work routine and #MonkMode inspo pics for bare-bones living. 

MC has been careful to gatekeep her monastery. “I hope my monastery isn’t mad at me because I don’t want spiritual institutions to blow up on TikTok and people to overwhelm these special places,” she says. “I also don’t want people to TikTok their vow of silence.” And yet Catholicism has already become part of aesthetic culture online, where people post cathedrals, rosaries, veils and crucifixes for a religious “vibe”, without engaging in any of the practices or beliefs. It’s not surprising then that, as much as people speak and post about wanting to run away to a monastery, when I reached out to multiple Upstate monasteries myself, the nuns and monks that did reply reported only a slight increase in interest from young people. The constraints of living under capitalism make it easier to tap into ideas around being in “monk-mode” for the sake of productivity than it is to actually log off and connect with whatever deity or practice you believe in. 

Benedictine Sisters of Elizabeth said they have “not had the experience of young people coming to the monastery” for retreats, but would love to connect with those interested. Monastic Sisters of Bethlehem said that interest has always been “pretty steady”, but they did have more first-time retreatants this year, at least in part due to the closure of another retreat house. “The thirst for God has been increasing. It is beautiful to see,” they wrote in an email. Still, it’s not just Catholic monasteries that young people are searching for. Sammy, a 20-year-old in Champaign, Illinois, sought out a Buddhist monastery that practised Vipassana while in Thailand in June. “I did three days there to get a taste for it, and it was great, but it was a lot more intense than I expected, and I was a lot less meditative than I thought,” she says. “I thought just being in the environment would make it easy to get into that meditative state and stay there, but it was really difficult.” Next time, Sammy says she wants to try for ten days. 

Last summer, journalist Sophia Li did her second vow of silence at a Buddhist monastery in Upstate New York. Growing up in a Buddhist-forward household, she says she wanted to challenge herself. “It slows down time, makes you aware of everything that’s happening inside you and shifts your frequency and your energetic levels,” she says. “Oftentimes, we drown out our inner mind with social media and entertainment, but a lot of what we’re actually searching for, a deeper meaning, comes from that internal silence.” Li lists the political climate, the ongoing genocide in Gaza and the decentralised internet giving us access to information at all times as some of the many reasons why more young people may be flirting with the idea of (at least temporarily) running off to a monastery. For some, the allure is a disconnection from their day-to-day lives. For others, it’s getting away from modern coping mechanisms. “Silence isn’t a coping mechanism,” says Li. “It’s a resource that can help us be more grounded in the compounding multi-crises happening in the world.”