This past weekend, actor, director and real Jewish man James Franco had a bar mitzvah. Hosted by Seth Rogen, his wife Lauren Miller Rogen, and comedy website Funny or Die, it was a star-of-David-studded affair, with musical performances by Miley Cyrus and Haim and appearances by Jeff Goldblum and Zac Efron. Although the religious initiation ceremony is generally reserved for 13-year-old Jews ready to observe in religious precepts, Franco had his 24 years later. Which is fine because, according to JeworNotJew.com, James Franco is definitely a Jew.
“Ever since I’ve known James, he’s been talking about wanting a bar mitzvah. We’re excited to see him finally become a man while also helping us raise awareness and funds for people living with Alzheimer’s and towards research that will lead to a cure,” Rogen said in a statement. All proceeds for the ticketed event – which took place at the Hollywood Paladium – went to the Alzheimer’s Association, whose mission is to raise awareness of the disease and support research for a cure. And this bar mitzvah was off da hook!
Haim – the pop rock trio consisting of sisters Este, Danielle and Alana Haim – took trad Jewish celebratory song “Hava Nigila” to task with their own roof-raising rendition. “We were about to dip into the old savings bank ourselves, but then the auction prices got crazy high,” Haim said on stage. “It’s great to see how much money was raised tonight.”
And as part of the performance, Franco was hoisted up on a chair.
Seth Rogen prepped the audience for Miley, saying, “This is so much better than when they played ‘Barbie Girl’ at my bar mitvah, I hope.” It was definitely comparable, as Cyrus took to the stage with a new band name (Miley Cyrustein & The Super Jews) wearing a giant Star of David and a cape which said “Shalom Y’all”, because why not? “A few things are going to get ridiculous tonight and that’s coming from someone who flew around on a giant hotdog for 20,000 people for 10 months,” said Cyrus.
RABBI JEFF GOLDBLUM STAGED A LIVE CIRCUMCISION
As is wont to happen with these coming-of-age type shebangs, Franco underwent a fake circumcision led by Jeff Goldblum, and in a career-best performance, Zac Efron played Franco’s penis, beamed on to a screen to make a plea to be left the hell alone. All in all, the event was wild, but managed to pull together $4 million in donations. Mazel Tov!