Memento mori, bitch!
You know you’re going to die, right? Sooner rather than later, honestly, and in the grand scheme of things it’ll basically be tomorrow. It could be tomorrow! It could be in ten minutes, when you step into the street a little bit too engrossed in your phone. Everything you love, ever have loved and ever will love will die, too, maybe after you but probably before. Then you will suffer through that until it’s your turn to RIP. How do you feel? Energised? Ready to carpe diem? Or horribly, desperately anxious?
New app WeCroak reckons it’ll probably be the former, which is why it promises to remind you of your mortality five times a day every day for the rest of your (short) life. The push notifications will come in the form of quotes from poets, philosophers, and other very smart people who are not only aware of death, but probably actually dead! The app is inspired by “a Bhutanese folk saying that to be happy one must contemplate death five times daily”, and, presumably, the motivational power of a panic attack.
The app is meant to encourage “contemplation, conscious breathing, or meditation” with fun quotes like “many have died; you also will die. The drum of death is being beaten”, but will only harass you from 7am to 10pm. So that’s something. For nine hours a day, instead of being reminded of your death, you can lie still, close your eyes, and practice being actually dead! It’s not clear what developer Ian Thomas, who is only 27 years of age, wants everyone to get out of this. Picture the scene: you’re sitting at your desk and your phone buzzes to remind you of your inevitable death. You think, “yes, I will die. What do I want out of life? I’d love to travel!”. You can’t. You have no money. You have responsibilities. Life is hell, but now you’re aware that you’re going to lose the small bits of happiness you do have.
WeCroak is supposed to sort of offer the same reminder to be present that the 1000+ mindfulness apps on the app store do too, like Calm and Headspace, but with its own morbid little spin. Where Headspace might make your iPhone a more chill presence, WeCroak will very likely do the opposite, pinging at random intervals to remind you that you’re wasting your precious, short life.
I was going to download the app and give it a go for a laugh, but a) it costs 99p, and b) I literally do not need it. I would actually quite like an app that could stop me from thinking about my impending death, or even cut down the amount I think about it to only five times a day. I cannot imagine the luxury of only thinking about death five times a day as opposed to every 45 seconds. But hey, if your brain works properly and you don’t think about the death of yourself and everyone you love every single time you open your eyes, maybe it’ll be good for you. Download it here.