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How to make it through Mercury Retrograde

Astrologer Emily Heather Price (aka The Voluptuous Witch) tells you how to stop your life from moving backwards when the planets do

In astrology, the planet Mercury is considered a bit of a trickster – and it turns a bit trickier a few times a year by stationing what is known as “retrograde”. The planet itself is not actually moving backwards, as is commonly thought, but an optical illusion is created during these times that makes the planet retrace its recent steps through the zodiac, from our perspective here on Earth. So, we get a review of what has already been – not always willingly.

Mercury Retrograde is a lot like a yellow light, in that while our lives don’t come to a grinding halt, ensuing events may cause us to slow down. Mercury is known to impact communication, travel, technology, and transit – all things we really want to run smoothly, hence the bad reputation of this astrological event. But with a bit of preparation and awareness, none of this really has to be such a bad experience.

Mercury stationed retrograde yesterday, on March 22, and will remain so until April 15. How will you survive the next few weeks? I have a few suggestions.

KEEP YOUR EYE ON ALL CONTRACTS AND COMMITMENTS

Communication is askew at this time, and even well-intentioned people or organisations could be missing essential facts and figures. Ideally, you will wait until after retrograde to sign any type of contract – but if that’s not possible, be extra-vigilant. No glossing over details.

PUT THE CREDIT CARD AWAY

Major purchases of technology and travel could prove complicated right now, so it’s better to research your tech and your voyages under the retrograde influence, and then buy once we’re in the clear.

SEXT AT YOUR OWN RISK

Those nudes could be on their way to your aunt, or that cutie you like who doesn’t know you’re sending nudes to someone else, so you’ll want to triple-check the contact before sending anything that shouldn’t be in a random’s hands.

SEX WITH AN EX WILL HAVE AN EXPIRATION DATE

No one listens to advice about this anyway, so there’s literally no point to writing this, but here we go: people from the past will surface during Mercury Retrograde, and some of those are likely to be ex-lovers. It’s so easy to forget why you stopped speaking to someone, but trust that this crucial information will find its way back to you before or right around Mercury Direct. If you insist on hooking up with an ex, just be honest about what it is – temporary.

SLOW DOWN

Between miscommunication, tech delays, traffic, and potential for accidents, you really don’t want to be rushing around with your eyes on your phone waiting for a pothole to claim you during Mercury Retrograde. Eyes up. Go slow. Pay attention.

CHECK YOUR FACTS

You know the whole thing about how assuming makes an ass of you me? Well, potential for that is high during this season, and we can make a huge mess if we take misinformation and then charge right into battle. Breathe, pause, ask questions, consider that no matter how inane a response or situation is, there may just be a whole other side to it you can’t see in the moment. Seriously, do this and thank me later.

AND SEE THE BRIGHT SIDE

Despite its reputation, Mercury Retrograde actually isn’t all bad. Retro is the ideal time to edit a manuscript, tie up loose ends, complete old, abandoned projects, or finally get closure on past situations. Cleaning out your inbox, decluttering, and making time to review and revise goals are actual magic during these phases. Pattern-recognition is also heightened at this time, making it perfect for reworking strategy.

This year in particular, we get a Retrograde right at the Equinox (which doubles as the astrological New Year), giving us a chance to get our priorities straight before zooming into the next solar cycle.

As fun as it can be to blame all our problems on the planets, Mercury Retro is really not trying to harm us. The worst outcomes are usually the result of wishing things were some way other than how they are – so when your iPhone falls in the toilet, or you get on the subway going the wrong way at 2am, try to see what a day without your phone or a train ride to a new part of the city can offer you. Have some faith that all doesn’t need to go exactly as planned for it to work out alright in the end.

Follow The Voluptuous Witch, and buy her special Mercury Retrograde program here