2017 feels like many lifetimes ago, yet Fyre Festival has endured as a cultural touchstone: the cheese sandwiches; the attempt to bribe Bahamian custom officials with the tantalising offer of a blowjob from a middle-aged man; Ja Rule claiming to have been “hustled, scammed, bamboozled, hood winked and led astray!!!” All of these moments have been seared into our minds forever. While the original attendees were left furious by the apocalyptic conditions they were forced to endure, maybe they were fortunate to have experienced the closest thing our generation has had to its own Woodstock. Now, seven years later, we have all been granted a second chance to survive being stranded on an island without basic necessities – Fyre Festival is back.

Despite his last attempt landing him in prison for six years, the festival’s founder Billy McFarland is determined to give it another go. “Fyre II has to work,” he told the Wall Street Journal in a recent interview. He has already started selling tickets (at $549.89 a pop), even though he doesn’t know where the event will be taking place or who will be performing.

McFarland claims that things will be different this time round: he’s working with a range of experienced companies, which he hopes will limit the opportunity for things to go wrong. But if the event goes off without a hitch, will attendees be disappointed all over again? It’s true that Fyre Festival is now a powerful brand, but it’s one that’s entirely synonymous with scamming and disaster. If I was paying $7,000 for a ticket in 2024, I’d feel short-changed to arrive and find a slick, smoothly-run festival — I’d be looking for a kind of extreme survival experience where my life was in serious danger; I’d want the chance enrich myself with a class action lawsuit or appear as a talking head on another Netflix documentary three years down the line.

In comparison, McFarland’s proposed ideas of stand-up comedy sets and “Karate Combat on the beach” sound deeply underwhelming. There’s plenty of festivals out there, why would anyone pay to attend Fyre II unless they were hoping for it to be as chaotic as possible? And while people are already shelling out for the new tickets, it’s hard to imagine as many influencers, celebrities and musicians getting involved this time round.

Kendall Jenner, Bella Hadid, Hailey Baldwin, and Emily Ratajkowski all promoted the first festival, and all took a blow to their reputations when the extent of McFarland’s fraud was revealed. No one of the same calibre will be lining up to associate themselves with him now, and he will likely struggle to book artists after Blink-182 were forced to pull out at the last minute. The only solution is to give people what they want: make the event a “Fyre Festival experience” and up the ante even further by spiking the water supply with cholera, spraying the attendees with Agent Orange and releasing a bear onto the island.