If you, like Ralph Wiggum, are sat lovelorn at your desk today, wishing that special someone would choo-choo-choose you, don’t fret. Every Valentine’s Day, musicians around the world deem that everyone deserves a present – and this year, they’re particularly sweet. Pop futurists Rina Sawayama and Kim Petras give us a very 2018 take on the love song, BbyMutha drops a new sex positive anthem, and Dita Von Teese has a heartbreaking slow jam. Admittedly we also get a truly heinous new video from Eminem and Ed Sheeran – it’s swings and roundabouts, really. Here’s our guide to the best new V-Day musical releases.

RINA SAWAYAMA

Rina Sawayama describes her new cut “Valentine (What’s It Gonna Be)” as an anti-Valentine’s song. “For those who want a little no strings attached action on a day that perpetuates the boring age old narrative of heterosexual monogamy”, she says in a press release. For double the love, catch Sawayama supporting Kelela in London later this month.

BBYMUTHA

Fresh from appearing on our list of ‘rude gal’ rappers to watch out for in 2018, BbyMutha drops her new anthem “Dancing On that Dick”. The title alone should give the game away – it’s a track as rude and riotous as we’ve come to expect from the Chattanooga, Tennessee rapper.

JB DUNCKEL

Over the past two decades, Jean-Benoît Dunckel has done his part for the ‘sexy Frenchman’ stereotype as one half of the duo Air. Today he announced his new solo album with the fittingly-titled “Love Machine”, a synth pop song with ornate flourishes.

NAO

While we wait for a new album from NAO, the UK singer has shared two new versions of familiar songs. “Nostalgia” and, more appropriately for Valentine’s Day, “Adore You” appear here in stripped back live versions of recorded at east London’s Urchin Studios.

KIM PETRAS

Kim Petras won hearts and blew minds with her appearance on Charli XCX’s Pop 2 mixtape. The euphoric “Heart to Break” comes with a bespoke Valentine’s Day card, which is very cute, as well as a love hotline. Yes, like a 90s teen pinup, can call Petras (it’s (657) 238-8399) and tell her your love troubles – she’ll be pick a few and give out advice on her YouTube channel at a later date.

DITA VON TEESE

Dita Von Teese’s new duet with French baroque pop chanteur Sébastien Tellier is taken from her upcoming self-titled album. “When I understood that Sébastien had a duet in mind with ‘Porcelaine’, I was excited,” Von Teese says in a press release. “I love his voice and I instantly thought of Serge Gainsbourg. But (I) don’t think Sébastien is a copy of Gainsbourg. He’s as good as him.”