Fans of Hunter Harris’s writing are well aware that she has range, with work spanning across multiple mediums. She’s written for TV, has an immensely popular Substack, Hung Up, where she delivers witty and thoughtful takes on your favourite TV shows, she’s profiled the likes of Zendaya and Usher and hosts a podcast called Lemme Say This. So it should come as little surprise that she was also up for the task to fictionalise the story of a real couple, Lia and Ola, for the No Ordinary Love anthology. No Ordinary Love is the second part of an anthology of modern romantic prose, challenging love story tropes and clichéd narratives by celebrating the differing perspectives and unexpected plot twists of real love. It features the stories of five real couples who met on Hinge, written by five fresh literary voices: Hunter Harris, Tomasz Jedrowski, Jen Winston, Upasna Barath and William Rayfet Hunter. 

You can read Lia and Ola’s story now at no-ordinary-love.co. Ahead of the release, we spoke with Harris about long-distance relationships, intention as the key ingredient to long-lasting love, starting with ‘hi’ and other lessons from working with a real Hinge couple throughout this process.

What’s a love story you wish you wrote and why?

Hunter Harris: The first one that comes to mind is Frances Ha, between the two friends. That’s such a special story. I also saw the new Eva Victor movie Sorry, Baby, which is similarly about how a romantic friendship can be between two women who have known each other for a long time. Then, for pure romance, I’m a defender of You’ve Got Mail (cancel me). I get that people say he’s catfishing her, but I think it’s sort of wonderful that you can be at cross purposes and yet still meet in the middle. Despite him being a corporate overlord, I think the movie is so romantic. 

Many people would know your work from your podcast, Lemme Say This, iconic TV coverage on your Substack, Hung Up, and your profiles of real couples, such as Macaulay Culkin and Brenda Song. How was this process different or similar to your previous work?

Hunter Harris: I think it’s very similar. Especially to the Brenda Song and Macaulay Culkin story, because that was the first time in a while that I had done something with a couple. It’s always fun to talk to both people, and then also to talk to them together, and I think Macaulay said something about it being a love inventory, which is the sweetest thing I’ve ever heard. But also it’s funny because, even though two people are in a relationship, the experience is obviously very singular. Hearing the different perspectives or memories is something I was really drawn to about this project. Two people can be in the same scene but have wildly different recollections. Like Ola trying to play it cool, but Lia knew he was nervous. 

My dream person would not be in cargo shorts. But I do think these things are negotiable when you meet the right person

The story showcases two people’s perspectives on the same dating process. How did you get into the heads of both Lia and Ola?

Hunter Harris: Not to say ‘this was not hard,’ but I truly think Lia has found a uniquely emotionally available man. He was so forthcoming with me about losing his job and grieving his mother in our conversations. The specificity with which he could talk about how he wanted to mirror his mother's love in how he approaches love. I’ve definitely spoken to people where you have to dig and chip away, but both Lia and Ola were really willing to share in a moving way what their relationship means to them and what they mean to each other. 

This story delves into the realities of finances in relationships, as well as societal expectations surrounding money and gender in relationships. Why do you think this topic is important for conversations around dating and romance today? 

Hunter Harris: It’s so easy to overdose on ‘split the check’ or ‘we need to check all the boxes about what it looks like to be treated well’ culture, especially early in the relationship. I definitely struggled with this in past relationships, but what stuck out to me about Lia’s perspective was that she realised all her other needs were being met: she was attracted to him, he was funny and he was so willing to include her in his life and ask for help. That’s a really key part of their relationship. She wasn’t trying to change him, he was being actionable, but also accepting that she does have a different perspective here and could help him with his resume and could help troubleshoot. There wasn’t so much an ambition gap as there was an achievement gap in their relationship. Lia had all these expectations for her birthday, but at the end of the day, what mattered most to her was simply being with the person she loved the most. There are all these other things about your partner being able to pay for a designer bag or get you a nice car, but it’s a social media reality TV-skewed perspective. We could be at the Four Seasons and hating each other like in White Lotus, or we could just be in sweatpants all the same. 

Ola notably wore joggers on their first date. Is there a lesson here about being open to how your potential future partner may dress?

Hunter Harris: I have so many clothing icks that this is a real lesson I’m trying to learn. I like that Lia clocked it and was like, ‘Not ideal, but we can keep talking.’ I think that’s a pretty good lesson. She was open, whereas I see cargo shorts and flip flops and think, ‘Absolutely not.’ 

What if they were your dream person? 

Hunter Harris: My dream person would not be in cargo shorts. But I do think these things are negotiable when you meet the right person. I could make a list, but I want to keep myself open to the idea that I could meet someone who doesn’t check any boxes I have in mind, yet they might be the perfect person for me. 

Or maybe they tick boxes you didn’t even know you needed ticked! In your opinion, when’s a good time in the dating process to have the money talk?

Hunter Harris: I’m newly single and navigating this for myself. I would say around the third date. It’s weird to talk about that stuff super early, but at the same time, I’m not going to enter into a relationship with anyone without having an idea of what feels affordable and comfortable for them. I would never want to be with someone who feels they have to live outside of their means just so we can be together. That feels like a recipe for disaster. 

Did your own perspective change at all on Lia and Ola’s relationship story or timeline throughout the process? If so, how?

Hunter Harris: They moved so quickly that their separate friends were like, ‘What the heck?’ I would be that friend. I would totally need you to bring him around me first. I need to see what their deal is. But if you know someone is worth the investment and you don’t want to get to know anyone else, that’s really vulnerable. My natural inclination would be to not be so forward and open, but now I’m thinking, why not go out on a limb?

I would never want to be with someone who feels they have to live outside of their means just so we can be together. That feels like a recipe for disaster

This story also explores grief. What do you think loss can teach us about romantic love?

Hunter Harris: Grief is nonlinear, and I was really struck by Ola saying he was directionless for a year, or maybe a year and a half. He wasn’t ready to date until he could take a summer to reevaluate, to start anew. A big part of their love, from my perspective, was that Ola had taken the time for himself and not rushed into anything immediately. He was so ready, willing and able once he met Lia. 

What’s your favourite thing about writing about love? What about your least favourite?

Hunter Harris: I love a breakup story. What can I say? The natural tension is there, and the arc of the story is handed to you on a platter because you want to know why. Even if the why is vague and hard to discern, it’s just really interesting to read. I would say the hardest story is where they are so in love, and it seems so easy and simple. It’s hard for me to communicate just how naturally charismatic and hilarious a couple is. Even the way Ola and Lia look at each other when they’re listening. You really just have to be there because they are so naturally funny, engaging and empathetic to one another. The work is then trying to make other people feel the way I feel about them. 

What makes a digital connection a compelling starting point for a story?

Hunter Harris: Because that’s how so many relationships start now. I think it’s the common denominator and, at least for myself and my friends, there’s usually at least one mutual you’re texting, ‘OK, are they weird?’ ‘Are they cool?’ That is another funny way we make our digital connections more real. Lia and Ola were only one friend away, but they met on Hinge. 

Did you learn anything new or noteworthy about your approach to relationships while writing Lia and Ola’s story? 

Hunter Harris: I grew up in the Midwest, and I think a willingness to talk about money is something that naturally feels inappropriate. But that’s not really practical. Lia and Ola discussing it so early in the relationship made them stronger. That was the lesson I learned. Also, Lia being so willing to help and accept help was another really big lesson. I’m really independent. I don’t like asking for help so it was good to learn that sometimes you just feel pulled toward someone and you can trust that it’s more important than asking, ‘But do they have this?’ All of these other things can fall by the wayside when you just have a natural attraction to someone, so you can follow that.