According to Gwyneth Paltrow, “loneliness is a human condition”. How do we know this? Because she said it on Instagram, of course. And what is the Oscar-winning actor’s cure for this all-consuming, soul-crushing experience of loneliness? It’s a weekend away in her million-dollar guesthouse!

The invigorating, enrichening stay takes the form of a paid partnership (of course) with the home rental website Airbnb. As Paltrow’s IG post goes, the company “had the brilliant idea of doing something to make the world a little less lonely, which is why I’m inviting you to come stay at my Montecito guesthouse for a night.” The actor then goes on to promise pool-side loafing, trail-side hiking, and a bathroom stocked with tonnes of Goop products. There’ll even be a chance to “find connections and commonalities over a delicious meal”, during what Paltrow promises to be a “luxuriating stay”.

In the accompanying video, Paltrow takes us on a tour of her humble abode, gracefully floating through each frame in a puff-sleeved prairie dress, her lilting tone taking on the guise of a Stepford Wife gone rogue. “Your skin is going to be better when you leave than when you came,” she says with a threatening smile after laying some Goop goodies on the pristine marble sink of a spotless, echoing bathroom.

If you’ve got the budget for the rental fee (full price TBD), then Gwenny also promises a chill out with her and her husband Brad Falchuk. “Another amazing thing we could do when you come and stay, is we could have a little chef’s dinner together in our wine room,” she suggests. “You can select whatever bottle of wine you like and we can have a fantastic cosy dinner with your guest and my husband.” The Falchuk-Paltrow’s are on a mission to find the perfect “guest”, and no one is getting in their way.

Booking for Gwenyth’s Montecito guesthouse opens August 15. Click here for more info.

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