We didn't think it was actually possible to feel sorry for Godzilla, a dyspraxic monster notorious for smashing up cities with absolutely no regard for human life. But now, we do. Japanese fans of the film have seen the trailer for the new Godzilla film and they're not impressed – they say he looks fat and out of shape.
The Japanese are seemingly protective over the monster that Ishiro Honda created in 1954, and their criticisms of 'Zilla's appearance lend credence to the common stereotype that Americans eat too much. In defence of the giant freak, gojira (Godzilla) is a portmanteau of the Japanese words gorira and kujira - in English, "gorilla" and "whale". Now we haven't seen many gorilla-whale hybrids in our time, but they're not exactly well known for their slenderness.
One Japanese user on the forum 2ch said simply, "He's so fat, I laughed." Superfan Fumihiko Abe, who's seen every Godzilla film ever made, told AFP ,"When I finally saw it, I was a bit taken aback. It's fat from the neck downwards and massive at the bottom."
Poor "Zilla. He hasn't made a movie for sixteen years and there can't many gyms that'll take him. He's the bastard child of a nuclear disaster thrown into Hollywood to be lambasted for being overweight. It's pretty hard for a gorilla-whale to stay in shape, and he's an actor who hasn't worked for nearly two decades – forgive a little comfort eating. Have a look below – do you think that Godzilla looks like a shambolic fatty?
Admittedly back in 1954, Godzilla did look a little leaner, certainly around the neck area, but he wasn't exactly ever a beacon of perfect muscular physique – it seems as though he's always packed a paunch. Check him out below – he looks a little lost, confused, an ugly, orphan brute overseeing a destruction that he doesn't understand. We don't know how it's happened, but we feel permanently sorry for Godzilla. Listen "Zilla, fuck the haters. You're beautiful just the way you are baby.